Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Opening day

2008 OPENING DAY RUNNING DIARY

This is a diary documenting what it is like for the everyday fan to be downtown on Opening Day. I am not a professional, and I don’t have the skill set to be. I do however, love sports, and spend a lot of my spare time thinking and talking about them. This was my Opening Day experience…

10:10 AM: Out the door, never been so optimistic about a Cleveland season. It’s also worth noting I have said this for the past 5 years with the Tribe, Browns, and CAVS.

10:14 AM: Really enjoying Hammer on 850. He, like everyone else is wondering why Ben Francisco is in AAA Buffalo. Delucci, if he keeps his spot, will cost the Tribe 5-7 games.

11:20 AM: Some predictions with the crew I went with:
· Mine: 97-65, Central Division Champs
· Dennis: 92-70, Wild Card
· Coop: 93-69, Central Division Champs
· Tom: Ohio State will win the National Championship. This isn’t a typo, and you will see this is a recurring theme.

11:28 AM: Watching people in their 50’s trying to use the basic functions of cell phones is really amusing me. Also they need to have the phones roughly 25 feet from their face to see it.

11:29 AM: State Farm is doing their best to have their logo all over Progressive Field. They have a team of about 10 young people giving out all kinds of free stuff to take into the stadium. They fail to realize people are throwing this stuff away almost immediately.

11:46 AM: A group of about 6 guys in their 20’s are marveling over a picture of an old Browns team. I think that they think it is St. Patrick’s Day, as they are covered in green. There was a long discussion within my circle about why people would ever wear green Indians gear. No conclusion was met.

11:49 AM: We are now talking about Terelle Pryor, and his character. My uncle is the biggest OSU fan I know, and he feels that delaying his decision to announce which college he’ll be attending was done with a “team-first” attitude, saying he didn’t want his basketball team to be heckled during the Pennsylvania state basketball tournaments. I think he delayed it to keep the national spotlight on him longer and he’s a primadonna. I think if he wouldn’t have chosen OSU, my uncle would hate him and share my sentiments. He refuses to admit this.

11:52 AM: Some guy who is away from his family for the day is marveling over key chains given out by some vendor. He then goes on a rant on how he can give those to those kids as souvenirs, and tell his children he bought them. Needless to say this guy is pretty cheap.

11:55 AM: First lame T-shirt of the day: “Suck the White Fox”

11:57 AM: Random Clevelander patron: “My goal today is to consume as much beer as I can and eat one hot dog”.

12:12 PM: Trying to get 4 people to agree on a place to go is pretty annoying. It’s especially aggravating when someone tells what their desired destination is, and then follows up with “but it really doesn’t matter to me where we go”, when it obviously does.

12:23 PM: We have talked about baseball for about 22 seconds, and now we are sitting in what appears to be a coffee shop, and the conversation is now weighing the strengths and weaknesses of charcoal and gas grills.


12:39 PM: I see a poster in the bathroom called Zen Sarcasm, with phrases on it like “if you always tell the truth, you never have to remember”. For some reason I really enjoyed the poster, and I thought I memorized like five other phrases. I didn’t, and now I’m drawing a blank.

12:41 PM: My uncle hates it when a player becomes unhappy in a situation, he can pout, refuse to play, and force a trade. I also am turned off by it, but try to explain to him the team really doesn’t have a choice, and the player could really sabotage the team. He responds with “it’s 12:41 and Ohio State will win the National Championship”.

12:46 PM: The crowd at the Boneyard goes crazy when “Another One Bites the Dust” starts playing. I find this eerily ironic, considering Cleveland sports teams’ history of succumbing to pressure.

12:57 PM: My aunt sends my uncle a text message, and she’s not happy we are downtown for the opener, and she is stuck at work. We don’t feel bad.

1:03 PM: I have never seen beer girls at a bar more uncomfortable in my life. This old guys are being very creepy.

1:15 PM: My godfather just convinced me to be his “guinea-billy” with golf tactics this summer. I have now been downtown for roughly two hours for what could be the Indians’ year, and there is no talk about them. Or sports in general.

1:20 PM: The conversation has now devolved into talking about our pets and showing off pictures of them.

1:31 PM: My uncle again gives is OSU championship prediction, insisting that Terrelle Pryor was the missing piece the last two years.

1:34 PM: I just walked to the bathroom, and I’m pretty sure every person I passed was staring at me. I think I have something on my face.

1:47 PM: The Boneyard is absolutely packed, and it is one in and one out at this point. I can think of a million jokes to put here, but I don’t think the newsroom could post any of them . My godfather also wants me to add he thinks he’s too pretty to be a golfer.

2:07 PM: Outdoor drinking apparently makes people lose all of their inhibitions. This is a pretty wild crowd on the rooftop bar at View.

2:11 PM: According to my uncle, OSU is still going to win the National Championship.

2:12 PM: We strike up a conversation with a man and two women, all of which seem pretty optimistic about the Tribe’s season. As evidenced by the first woman’s 155-7 prediction, they have clearly been out for awhile.

2:21 PM: Still talking to these three people, and there are awkward silences left and right. Since we are stuck in a corner, there’s really no good way to get myself out of it. I can’t stop looking at this woman’s 70’s style hairdo.

2:37 PM: We are now at Pickwick and Frolic, and yesterday afternoon I thought it was funny to call it PickWACK and Frolic. That’s not as funny as I thought it was. They have a weird combination of a bar and a formal dining establishment there. I couldn’t figure it out.

2:42 PM: Sitting and watching ESPN 850’s live broadcast from Pickwick and Frolic. Mark “Munch” Bishop and Kenny Roda are revealing the Indians’ starting lineup. During a break they talk to us, and they couldn’t be nicer. I’m also a little biased because Munch personally responded to an email of mine once. Afterwards, Roda gave my uncle and I Cleveland Gladiators tickets.

3:10 PM: I really like the Indians’ throwback jerseys. They’re a lot cooler looking than those one’s with the vest and short sleeves. Somehow they make C.C. Sabathia look bigger. Also, beers are $6.75. Gotta pay for David Delucci somehow.

3:12 PM: Two guys are heckling Casey Blake. Look, I know he’s not a superstar, but he’s a poor man’s version of a 5 tool player. I like him because he’s always really overrated in baseball video games, and he’s had some big hits for me. I realize that’s juvenile, but I can’t change how I feel.

3:15 PM: People really need to get over Jim Thome leaving Cleveland. It happens all the time. And if the Indians could afford him, he would’ve stayed. Nobody in America would leave $20 million on the table to stay in a current position.

3:17 PM: Either people have terrible depth perception, or they’re extremely optimistic, but everytime a member of the Indians hits a fly ball, they think it’s going to be a home run. It’s getting pretty annoying.

3:20 PM: Why Asdrubal Cabrera isn’t batting second in this lineup is beyond me. They were something like 21-6 last year when he batted in the two hole. Maybe they’re punishing him for wearing that silly necklace.

3:24 PM: People are really over exaggerating about C.C. giving up this home run. He’s a top four pitcher in the game, let him work.

3:28 PM: Progressive Field just doesn’t feel right. And they won’t let you forget who bought the naming rights either, with over 23,000 Progressive logos.

3:31 PM: Johnny Peralta is going to have a big offensive year.

3:33 PM: I don’t care what anyone says about how good the Tigers’ offense is. The Tribe still has a top-7 offense, with little to no holes (except for Delucci). They’re going to score a lot of runs, and once Ben Francisco comes over from AAA, it’s only going to get better.

3:35 PM: Asdrubal Cabrera gets a favorable call at the plate. Dennis: “It’s opening day for the umpires too!”.

3:38 PM: Fans are really getting mad at the repeated pickoff moves to first base. Get over it, it is part of the game.

3:39 PM: I think the fan definitely interfered on Franklin Gutierrez on his HR. No complaints from the “Prog”, as I have heard a countless number of people call the park. Just because Jacobs Field was “the Jake”, doesn’t mean you need to use the same formula to come up with a new nickname. It worked for “the Jake because Jake is short for Jacob. Nothing is short for Progressive. A nickname will come in time, we don’t need to force the issue.

3:45 PM: Mark Buehrle is a lame-o. Chicago thinks that their black uniforms are intimidating to their opponents. Nobody (and by nobody I mean me) takes them seriously.

3:48 PM: Victor Martinez is easily the best all around catcher in baseball. It’s amazing how he is already dialed in to the ball.

3:52 PM: These restrooms think they are at Cleveland Browns Stadium, and people still won’t shut up about how much they hate Jim Thome.

4:01 PM: I just saw a guy with a button up on, with only 4 buttons fastened and no shirt on underneath. I’m guessing he’s a recent divorcee, and the last time he was single was in the mid-70s to early 80’s.

4:05 PM: The logos on the outfield wall are very similar to Major League 2, when Roger Dorn was running the team. I’m not a fan.

4:10 PM: Surprisingly there was almost zero reaction when C.C. got the Tribe out of trouble. Why aren’t the fans more into the game? I hope this sellout isn’t just because of Opening Day.

4:13 PM: These concession lines are longer than most lines at Cedar Point.

4:28 PM: The guys behind me think they are baseball experts on the level of Peter Gammons. Also, one of them is wearing a bright yellow Indians windbreaker, immediately making his opinion(s) unworthy and stupid.

4:31 PM: Franklin Gutierrez slides hard into second. This Tribe team might be pretty tough.

4:34 PM: Nick Swisher is at the plate. He was the perfect Oakland Athletic, so I find it kind of weird to see him in a Chicago uniform. I firmly believe he is injury prone for the rest of his career or his disappears off the face of the Earth…unless he changes teams.

4:38 PM: Thome is up, I really think C.C. is gonna K him here…I have a feeling.

4:40 PM: Didn’t K him, but he grounded out to first. Anybody who is a professional athlete and considers eating pancakes a form of training….you’re a loser. I’m talking about you, Jim Thome. (My berating him is not rooted from him leaving. I never was a huge fan of him, I think it had something to do with him holding the bat up between every pitch. I hate when players delay the progress of the game for no reason, even if it is his routine).

Note: I didn’t realize until I typed it today that if I didn’t say which athlete eats pancakes before every game, the majority of people would’ve thought I was talking about C.C.

4:43 PM: I don’t like how players like Hafner and Thome can be effectively defended by using a drastic shift. You would think this would motivate the player to learn to better hit to the opposite field. I know that’s easier said than done, but it could really make the player more dangerous.

5:01 PM: People are already saying C.C. insn’t worth the huge contract he will command in the offseason. This is ridiculous, and if we can’t sign him, we’ll definitely miss him.

5:04 PM: The people sitting in our section are very pessimistic about the 2008 season, and the general consensus is that the Tigers are just too good. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? We have two of the top ten pitchers in the AL, a very good lineup, a very good bullpen, and above all of that they are even hungrier than last year. I understand people have been suffering through Cleveland sports for years, but it’s not helping anyone to sit back on the first game of the year and basically write them off. FYI, it was the guy in the yellow coat leading this conversation. Idiot.

5:09 PM: Asdrubal just K’ed. I still really like him. He is the kind of player that makes Mark Shapiro shine. Not every GM would’ve allowed him to be put in the lineup when the person you traded for (Josh Barfield) isn’t panning out. I like how he has no ego. I also think it is funny that ESPN’s Bill Simmons says he looks like a cross between Jeff Garcia and Boggs from Shawshank redemption.

5:10 PM: Uncle guarantees an OSU National Championship.

5:18 PM: Rafael Perez might have the nastiest stuff on his pitches in the bigs. He is going to be one of the major reasons we finish 5 games ahead of the Tigers. I’m not looking forward to hearing commentators speak of “the Raffies”, meaning Perez and Bentancourt. It’s pretty annoying, it isn’t clever, and we’re gonna hear it a minimum of 135 times this year.

Also, another OSU National Championship has been guaranteed by my uncle.

5:20 PM: Not only does he predict OSU will win the National Championship, he says Terelle Pryor will be starting when they do.

5:29 PM: Ryan Garko will be Cleveland’s next “blue collar” sports hero, much the same way Carlos Boozer was before he robbed a blind man, well, blind.

5:38 PM: The White Sox aren’t good, I wish it wasn’t this close. They might be the worst team in the division.

5:48 PM: Panic has set in at Progressive Field. Why don’t people realize it takes a little while for pitchers to get into a groove? The bullpen is among the best in the bigs, and it isn’t going to be this shaky and bad. You wouldn’t forecast an entire relationship on the first date, right? Well maybe. Ok I’m saying the ‘pen is very good, and they will be, got it?

6:13 PM: The poor man’s 5 tool player comes through in the clutch! Just missed the grand slam, but we’ll take it. You gotta love a player who is sporting a playoff beard in March.

6:25 PM: You will always hear me defending Joe Borowski. Sure he doesn’t do it the easy way, or in the manner in which is easy on the stomach, but he pretty much gets the job done. That said, he looks really nervous out there, and that’s making me (more) nervous.

6:27 PM: Whew! Go JoBo. Always gets the job done, like I said. I really like this Tribe team. It seems like there are no egos, and they all genuinely seem like they love the team. That is an intangible other teams would kill for. Maybe that crazy drunk lady wasn’t so far off when she said they’d go 155-7. I bet if I found her now she’d say 162-0.

6:30 PM: Thanks a lot for reading, and I will continue to post Indians blogs throughout the season with my thoughts and observations. Leave me comments! Go Tribe!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

its almost like i was there. i love it. keep it up

Anonymous said...

Good job Beel .. and yes i plan on making this blog numerous 'drunken' (is that a word?) times throughout the season.

ITT b MEE said...

$6.75 a beer! WOW!! I am going to have to gett a job to go these games. That's worse than the parking or sitting in front of a fan wearing an excess-induced vitamin urine yellow tribe windshirt. GO TRIBE!!! I am not sure about one item though...who does your uncle think is going to win the national football championship?

Anonymous said...

I like how Craig clearly uses the wrong word and doesn't care. What exactly is "making" a blog? I think you mean 'reading' or 'commenting on'. He doesn't let things like making sense stand in the way of his feelings.

Anonymous said...

very good job it felt like i waqs there! your entry at 11:28 was right on point people in their fiftys gotta be the funniest with cell phones!